Hello? Is it me you're looking for?

A word for the wary: this post is almost nothing to do with my training and/or fitness.  It's mostly going to be me griping and meandering through thoughts.  Consider thyself warned.

So it's Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching So You Think You Can Dance (USA version).  I love to watch dancing- something about it makes me happy.  Meanwhile, in Brisbane, a mate of mine is gearing up for a boxing match he's been training for over the last six to nine months.  These factors, plus the influence of a constant niggling in the back of my mind, started me thinking: I need something.

Let me elaborate.  For the last ten months, I've been exercising and training mostly to lose excess weight, regain some fitness, and gain a body I can feel happy about.  I've gone a long way towards the fulfilment of that goal.  I've still got some distance to go, so don't think of this as the end of that.  What I'm thinking of is something beyond that.  Something where I can put all that I've worked towards to some use.  Like my Brisbane mate - he's been training, exercising and working for this upcoming bout.  For him, tonight's fight will be the culmination of all he's worked towards for months.  Win, lose or draw, he'll have achieved something other than getting fitter/faster/stronger.  For that, I envy him.

Don't misunderstand me - I am immensely happy with what I've managed to do over the last year.  I can now do things I haven't been able to do for many years, if ever.  I can now do push-ups - something I've never been able to do.  I can fit into "normal" range clothing (no more Mr Big range).  I'm getting muscle definition on my arms and chest.  These are not trivial achievements, and I don't mean to portray them as such.

However, I think I need to do something more.  Something equivalent to a boxing match to work towards or accomplish, but (maybe) without the pugilism.  Basically, I'm looking for something to do on the days when I don't go to the gym.  But what can I do?  This is where I get really stuck.

For those that know me well, and most of the people who read this blog fall into that category, you know the kind of person I am, and how I approach things like this.  Past experience has shown that i have something akin to a six-month attention span when it comes to hobbies or extra-curricular activities.  I come at them full of enthusiasm, then six months later I lose interest and give it up.  I don't know why.  Maybe it'd because, when things are routine, they become obligations and they stop being fun.  Maybe it's something else I haven't yet identified.  Who knows.  Frankly, I'm still quite astonished that I have managed to maintain my gym routine this long - I didn't actually expect it to last.

That last point makes me think maybe I'm at a point in my life where I can handle that kind of routine.  I just need to find something that can occupy the available time-slots.  And this is where I come unstuck.  I can't think of something I want to do that I am capable of.  For instance, recently a Jujitsu class started in my neighbourhood.  I thought that might be worth investigating.  Then I remembered my knee injury, and the primary reason I gave up on martial arts years ago.  I watch a dance show, and (apart from the knee problem), I decide that I don't have required grace/flexibility/co-ordination for dance.  And this happens for pretty much everything I think about - I can find a reason or excuse (I'll let you decide the difference) not to take it up.  I'm becoming spectacularly good at finding excuses for not doing things.  If only making excuses was a hobby in itself; I'd be a shoe-in.

My intent in writing this wasn't to come over all "Woe is me!" and whatnot.  My objective was twofold.  One, I'm trying to purge this mentality of finding excuses for everything and actually start seriously looking for something to fill my time.  I guess I'm trying the Voldemort theory - by giving voice to my issues I hope to strip them of some of their potency.

My second objective was to canvas my readers for ideas.  So here's where you come in: I need ideas.  For those of you who know me well, what kind of things can you suggest that fit in with my personality, abilities and skills.  For those that don't, feel free to offer suggestions anyway.  As long as it's a genuine suggestion, I will take it seriously and see if it is something I can sink my teeth and/or time into.  Some guideline:
 - It has to be social (a secondary part of my objective is to meet new people, possibly a future partner if the situation arises).
 - It has to be active.  That doesn't mean it has to be cross-country caber tossing or anything ridiculous like that.  I would just prefer that it weren't a purely sedentary activity so that I can take advantage of my new fitness levels, and possibly continue to improve them.
 - Cost is a minor factor, but transportation is a significant one.
 - It should be something that takes up a few hours each week, but not necessarily an entire night/day/weekend.  A Wednesday evening or Sunday morning (maybe both on occasion) is perfect.
 - It needs to be relatively friendly on knees.  Again, that doesn't mean a sedentary activity, just needs to be something that poses minor risk of injury.
  - It would ideally have an achievement component.  For example: if I chose boxing as per my Bris-mate, there would be an end-of-year bout to work towards.

Hopefully there's enough there for you to work on.  Don't be surprised if I don't take up a suggestion; rest assured I will consider all of them seriously.

The floor is open...

He who laughs last, thinks slowest

Well, the time has been and gone.  October 26 was the deadline to reach my weightless goal of 100kg.  I suppose you're all in an agony of suspense as to whether or not I made it, right?  Actually, I know you jolly well aren't because everyone who reads this blog knows that I made it!  Woohoo, good show and jolly good, old bean!  Or something like that.

That was a week ago, and things have been (mostly) stable weight wise since then.  I have to admit though, I think I've slipped my grip on the reins a bit.  In the last week and a half, I've twice devoured a whole pizza in one sitting.  It also feels like I've been eating more than I should in general, though I don't know if that've completely true (well, the pizza is obvious).  I'm not sure if I know why; I can only let the "I just turned 30" excuse ride for so long before I have to start taking control again.

So two things are happening as of this week.  First, I am taking control of my eating.  I think I need to start making my lunches again.  I've been relying on the many fine/alright/dodgy food vendors near my workplace for most of my meals, including large coffees (made with soy milk) most mornings.  I think this has to stop, or at least slow right down.  I think that no more than two days a week can I have a brekky coffee.  By brekky coffee, I mean one bought from a cafe, so it's made mostly from soy milk; instant coffee has bugger all milk in it so isn't anywhere near as bad.  Also, I need to do some shopping - I will start taking my lunches again.  Not only do I get more fruit and more manageable portions that way, but I know it will save me money too.  As I said, I've been relying on the food vendors near work for lunches, and while I can avoid the truly crapulous food, I think I am still eating too much of the stuff I buy.  So that needs to stop.

Second, I ratify my next goal and start working towards it.  I discussed with my trainer about two weeks ago what my next goal will be, and if I recall correctly we decided that I would aim to reach 84kg by February 17, 2012.  While these may seem arbitrary dates and weights to a casual observer, but they represent a total weight loss of 50kg in precisely 12 months.  So that is my primary goal.  My secondary goal, which I hope to achieve even if I don't make my primary goal, is to reach 90kg by the end of January.  It was originally going to be by New Year's, but I think that will be difficult, if not impossible, to achieve amidst all the parties, functions, travelling and whatnot.

So there we have it.  Take control of the beast that is the appetite, and begin the uphill slog to my next fitness goal.  Nothing too terrible now, is it?

Oh, and another thing.  Yesterday I redid my bio-age assessment with my trainer.  When I first started I had a bio-age of 41 (I think) and my chronological age was 29.  I am now chronologically 30, and have a bio-age of 31.  Time for another "woohoo" methinks.

Now, what could possibly go wrong from here on in?